Shame is among the most “use-less” of human emotions, with the power to convince us that that little voice in our head is right after all—you know, the one that says “You’re not good enough,” or “You’ll never really belong,” or “Who would actually love you?”

It’s not only an excruciatingly painful feeling, but also a universal one. Rich or poor, overweight or fit, successful or barely making eds meet, we all experience shame from time to time, whether we admit it or not (and we usually don’t).

Shame can force us to alienate ourselves and seek refuge in unhealthy manners such as or addiction, violence, aggression, depression, eating disorders and bullying.

Hence why it’s crucial that we learn ways to deal with it and to build healthy barriers against it.